Posts Tagged With: single

New look..

Hi All!

So my blog is kinda under construction & has got a new look. Just feel I’m entering a bit of a new phase as I get closer to 21 & my year of singleness is going to be entering a new chapter. Less focus on that and moving towards new things.

I’ve changed the blog name from Pursuing Heart to Dancing in the Wind. Just wanting to bring on more chilled vibes, as one of my friends has sent me photos from when we surfed years back in high school. Back in grade 9 or so. She has edited them a bit. But will upload them as they come in or as I feel needed. The themes and pics have changed to go with everything else. Can’t wait to get home for the holidays either – just gonna add to the new phase and super chilled vibes 🙂 super stoked. The address may also change.




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A ring for a single lady’s journey

When did it start…..

15 September 2011 (I became single)

Buy a ring….

31 January 2012


Deo-Dane du Plessis (a very good friend of mine)

Date of Arrival of the ring once made smaller…

10 February 2012

Made smaller to….

a size “M”


  1. A new beginning
  2. God has a plan (& I must be patient)
  3. A reminder of my singleness, being fine on my own waiting to see God’s plan happening in reality.

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A brand new year

It’s a brand new year with interesting things happening. Yesterday I registered on campus for my third year of studies and classes officially begin on tomorrow.

The week that just passed I had my lovely little sister enter her first year here at varsity with me, so she has to study hard to get into medicine. Last night varsity cup started, was great watching the first rugby match to kick off the season.

Unfortunately though, I’ve had my friend tell me that with her being so busy last year, she missed one of her subjects and because of that tiny little mistake she won’t graduate ‘til September and she can’t do her honours. But there are so many other things with that, so she will be leaving end of February, moving out of the house and into a place with her brother, back home to where her parents live. So sad to have her leave but we both feel God has a different plan for her. I mean she has found an amazing guy, she has done well in her studies, she’s gotten a job as a secretary until she can figure out where she wants to go from here, she’s going to live closer to her family and in a place where she’ll be able to find some rest and just get back to God and what’s really important, especially after her busy years at varsity. She’s beginning a whole new chapter which is going to be amazing and special and that we are so at peace with. I mean, she has her support system, we’ll always be there for her, and she’s only 2 hours away – which means a lot of amazing visits! With that, I have realized that this is going to be a great but tough year. I really need to focus and study this year. Remember what’s important (not only my studies) and go for it and not have anyone stand in my way – if someone does, then they don’t really care about me. Being at varsity, kinda is about working towards a future which is pretty important.

I did register on campus yesterday – was amazing to see my friends again and it was fabulous only taking an hour to register, something that used to take us all day!! But with that – yes, I saw my ex. We study together. Felt terribly awkward but it also makes me realize each time how happy I am without him and how independent and amazing it feels to know I don’t need him or any other man. I don’t need any guy’s approval and I’m okay just being me, doing my own thing.

So I can’t wait to get this year up and running, have fun being single, finding me and God and sharing the love and awesomeness with everyone I meet.

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Single By Choice – not because I have to be

I am so glad to be doing this. I appreciate this journey so much. Already I have had guys push themselves against me. Guys who don’t understand that I just want to be friends and don’t respect that. I’ve already had to explain the ring and what it means and already some guys don’t understand it. What sucks about this process is that this is going to happen a lot now and further on and I will get frustrated, get upset and cry, but in the end it is not my fault or my problem. They have to understand and if they don’t or can’t and they still can’t respect the decision then it’s too bad. Then they are idiots and not worth being mates with anyway.

I’m already learning just how much I hate other guys trying to kiss or touch me and their lack of respect for me  and any other girl. Guys who think they can see you once or just meet you and try to pull in without getting to know you a little at all first – they’re quite off putting.

I mean I went out to the “square” with my sister and her friends last night and watching those guys trying to pick them up because they think the girls will get drunk quickly and have sex with them was terrible. Because firstly my sister and them don’t get drunk easily – they’re from Margate and secondly when they have had a bit too much to drink – they give all guys ‘bat’ and want nothing to do with any guy. Was such a learning curve, I couldn’t wait to get out of there. Luckily I was able to speak to a really good friend of mine, Ryan, while a waited to get out of that place, so he was able to help keep me company and stuff ‘til I got home safely and was able to make me feel super comfortable in a very uncomfortable situation.

But point is – I’m glad to be waiting on God to send me the right guy instead of these weird guys who act like idiots and have no respect for any girl.


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Being Single for a Year

After a long holiday and being
single since 15 September 2011, I have decided to stay single and do it properly.

After speaking to a very good friend of mine, someone I have mentioned before, her name is Deo-Dane, I decided to do something that she would recommend all girls do. I’m so sick of falling in and out of relationships and being used.

So together we went to go buy me a ring. One that I’d wear on my finger symbolising my singleness of a year or until the right guy would come along. It’s a year or more of just being friends with all the guys I meet, pursuing God and getting to know myself more. It’s a promise of not getting into any sort of romantic relationship with any guy and standing up for what I want and believe in. So it means being up front with guys and cutting them off if all they want is to get with me. Many guys will fall away as they don’t want friendship but want a lot of other stuff and honestly that is fine by me.  The right guy will wait and respect my decision to be friends until at least a year is over.

This time is not about focusing on guys but on me and who I am and my relationship with God, choosing His Will for my life daily instead of choosing my will. It is about figuring out what I want and need and not settling for anything less. As a lady I deserve respect and to other ladies out there – you do TOO. In this time my heart will be healed and then I can give a WHOLE heart to a special guy instead of a PIECE of my heart to him. Now all I have to do is wait patiently on God being reminded of His promise and plan every time I see the ring.

So guys – beware – we’re just friends. And ladies – the journey has begun.

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