A Restless Heart

Something I’ve struggled with the most over the past weekend that has left my heart unsettled… Is not only people’s words but also what is not said and the body language that is left to fill in the blanks. Suddenly I can see why people struggle when I refuse to say something or take my time before just responding…

In general, people have expectations or even have a lack thereof, both having ripple effects that can be positive or negative…finding the balance can be tough… Expectations that have been put into words or not… But the ones that do the most damage are probably the unspoken ones. Before this weekend in general and this weekend, by people I am close to or not, unspoken standards and expectations have left me unsettled the most. Not only by others but those I have myself… It has put me under a lot of pressure and made me reflect a little on what I do too… Asking myself, whether I have any unspoken standards or expectations of others and what they are and who are under them? And whether or not it is fair on whomever is under it?!

It is something that really has broken me and left my heart in an awkward space as I try figure out how it influences the way I think and feel as well as my perspectives and relationships… It really has left me upset – quite challenged and insecure and disappointed all rolled up in one…

This definitely is a time to seek the Lord, as I look inward in an effort to find some solution and comfort in His words…

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Categories: Pursuing Faith, Pursuing Hope, Pursuing Life, Pursuing Love | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

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